My Sentimental Drudgery
I've begun thinking about what the future holds. I guess because I'm getting
older and stepping out on my own. I don't want to be a burden on anyone five years from now. I'd like to have the free, hell
raising, give a damn spirit I attempt to possess now.
I know in a month I'll lose some of the best friends I've ever had and I may
never again see the people I grew up with. I'll lose a lot of the freedoms that sit at my feet now and will be thrust into
a socialistic-like society where I have to work for everything I get. I'll never be able to act like an idiot and get away
with it, and I'll probably never be able to cry myself out of tickets [they said it would only work once, maybe twice, but
I'm up to try number five… in your face *ahem*] Yet, I still hope I'll be able to see as many shows as I have through
the years 12 to 18.
Four years ago, I wouldn't have cared when you told me where I'd be today.
Three years ago, when I started Scratch!, I would have never thought that shows may die off for me. I've met so many great
people through this experience, and I hope you all know that. I knew so many great bands at the beginning that have disbanded
and many more have formed. Some, after I met them, I swore if they broke up I would cry. I don't think I ever actually shed
a tear, but I was close.
My old yearbook teacher always told us when something went wrong, 'the times
they are a'changin' from the Bob Dylan song. And as cliché as that might sound, she had a point. I don't know what's going
to happen, but I'm sure it will be great. Moving, college [UTSA... yay!], ect.
I hope you'll all stay with us.
To everyone's who's been with us since the beginning, I love you all. You're
truly awesome and you've all pointed me in the right [or sometimes what we thought was right at the time, and was fun, but
ended up being really, REALLY, stupid... ixnay on the atovay anyone?] direction. And even if we fuck up royally, I hope we
keep going the same way.
But if the day comes where I finally have to shut my mouth and put down my
guitar [yes, I keep quoting Sublime, but I love that line] I know a handful of you who will be right there to pick up the
pieces of what's left and carry on without me.
I love you all and look forward to my next 18 years with you.
{Much love}
Panda-la
{may we all be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows we're dead}
